Hi. My name is Allyson and I have a problem with my weight.
There. I said it. Admitting it is the first step, right?
For as long as I can remember I've always had goals focused on "losing weight" or "being healthy" or something along those lines. Growing up I was never athletic like some of my siblings and never did anything habitual to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Looking back, I think that my current health and lifestyle are suffering because of it and it's time to make a change and more importantly, admit that I have a problem.
My personal problem is laziness. Oh boy, can I be lazy! Laziness is my inner demon and it has taken its toll on me for years and years. It had gotten to the point that it clouded my mental state and caused me to push my weight problem to the back of my mind. I told myself that I didn't have that big of a weight problem. I told myself that I just had a baby and I deserved to sit on the couch for a bit, eat that brownie, nap while the little one naps, and on...and on...and on.
Five years ago I wasn't this way.
I think back to five years ago and wonder what is so different between then and now that let me get so unhealthy and so overweight?
The answer is laziness.
Five years ago this past November I returned home from an 18 month full-time mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Italy. During my mission, I didn't have the time to be lazy. Every minute of my day was planned out, including exercise first thing in the morning. Like I mentioned before, I hadn't been diligent with exercising or eating healthy before my mission, so I wasn't very intense at first with exercising when I arrived in Italy. That all changed when I was forced to lead an active lifestyle as a missionary...always on-the-go, and doing a lot of walking. I started exercising with more intensity and started feeling better about my body. After I had been in Italy for a year, I was transferred to a city where I traveled by bicycle instead of walking or riding a bus. At first I was terrified of the bike. Terrified of falling, getting hit by a car, running into pedestrians, etc. It was the worst experience at first. Covered in bruises, I would ask myself what the heck I was doing at the end of each day. It was painful to learn to ride a bike all over again, but after a few weeks I was amazed that I got the hang of it. I was even more amazed that I was starting to enjoy riding my bike! I was even more impressed with how much that bicycle whipped my body into the best shape it had ever been! I was working out more intensely each morning, and I felt great.
When I returned home from Italy I was in the best shape of my life. I continued to work out, jumping rope for 30 minutes without stopping, cycling, and going on the occasional run. I kept it up for a few months, but then my old friend laziness came crawling back into my life. Working out and eating healthy got pushed aside while laziness took its toll, and over the past five years it has become worse and worse.
So here we are. Or at least here I am. Five years later and I've gained back all the weight I lost in Italy and then some.
But now is the time for me to change. Enough is enough, and I'm blogging about this so that I can be more accountable to myself and be more consistent with making a lifestyle change that will last. In the past I never let those changes stick because I didn't share them with enough people. I felt like if I didn't tell anyone, it wasn't that big of a deal, and when I failed at something I was only accountable to myself, so I could just go back to being lazy and no one had to know. But I have finally realized that it's my health and it's a huge deal, so I am determined to succeed!
So here it is, out in the open. Me, committing myself to change my habits and become healthy this year. My goal is to lose 100 pounds. More than that, I want to gain back my confidence and the ability to combat laziness and lead a healthy lifestyle.
So please join me on this grand journey of mine. I know it won't be easy, but I know that it will be worth it.
